In case you were wondering....

.....Yes, we're still alive! We've had a whirlwind of a few months and my blogging has suffered because of it. But here I am to update everyone who is waiting with baited breath (all three of you) to see what's been going on with the Wilhelms!

We still have our sweet little 2 year old boy with us that we've had since March. He's DEFINITELY comfortable with our family and has decided to start showing us his silly, ornery side along with letting his "terrible twos" come out. His favorite word is NO and he likes to color on walls, doors, tables, couches....you know....anything EXCEPT paper! He is OBSESSED with sports balls of any kind and is devastated every day when we make him change his socks and take his coat off. He thinks it's HILARIOUS to toot on anybody he can get to and laughs so hard when we tell him not to pick his nose because it's gross (typical boy). He's just so funny! I don't know HOW a 2 year old can be sarcastic already, but he totally is.

Just a few days ago, his newborn brother came into care as well. While we are so glad to be able to provide a safe place for him and he is the CUTEST, squishiest little guy, I am hurting for the boys' mom and praying things turn around quickly for her. Please join me in that prayer! While foster care is amazing in so many ways, it is equally sad and overwhelming in others.

We were unsure about taking a newborn because we feel like we're old and we really like sleep and we had NO idea who we could find to take care of a newborn while we work, but God provided a daycare, our family and friends have provided clothes, formula and everything else we could need and we've even gotten a few hours of sleep each night :) His sweet little smiles and his little dimple make up for the all-night grunts and poop explosions.

All of the kids love having a baby in the house and I especially love that the 2 year old gets his biological sibling with him. He is LOVING "helping" feed him and bringing me diapers for him and anything else he can do. It's very sweet and I'm glad they get to be together! My older two are the absolute BEST helpers and have done so much to make the transition easier.

So here we are....unexpectedly back to being a party of 6, driving the hot-mess express and walking around like sleep-deprived zombies. If you see my dirt-covered Tahoe screeching into the school parking lot at 8:14am and me shoving my half-dressed kids out the door so they're not "technically late" while empty water bottles and cracker wrappers fall out the door behind them, please just throw up the Katniss Everdeen 3-fingered salute and pray for the odds to be ever in my favor!

Tessa's 7th birthday celebration!

She went to bed as my 6 year old baby....

.......and woke up as a sassy 7 year old girl!!

We usually fill their room with balloons and I totally thought I had a bunch in our birthday decoration box...but when she finally went to bed the night before her birthday, I dug the box out and NO BALLOONS! So I put streamers all over her door instead. Not gonna lie...I'd be totally okay discontinuing the balloon tradition and doing streamers instead. It takes a loooooooooooooong time to blow up enough balloons to cover the floor!

She had chosen donuts for breakfast, so she blew out her candle and then wanted to open a few of her gifts.

I love her so much!

One of the presents she opened that morning was this unicorn lamp. It will always make me laugh! When I asked her what she wanted for her birthday, she thought for a minute and then said in the sweetest voice, "Can you get me a lamp that doesn't burn me?" I was like, "What the heck are you talking about??" She said the lamp she currently had (which was like a goose-necked metal lamp) burns her hands every time she turns it on and off. I felt so bad, but she'd never told me that before, so I got her a lamp that didn't burn her (and was super cute!).

After gifts, we took a few fun pictures outside and then headed to Nana's for her party with her cousins.

After I got off work, I picked up Tessa and Nana and we met Aunt Brooke in Wichita. Tessa had decided she wanted to do a girls shopping evening for her birthday. And I'm so glad she did! It was a lot of fun!

She opened her present from Aunt Brooke in the car and was SO excited! She got a Garmin Vivofit--she'd been wanting one for SO long!

We went to Wal-Mart, where Tessa bought a baby doll that poops and pees in her diaper--Nana thought it was disgusting! Tessa thought it was hilarious!

What's a trip to Wal-Mart without a group selfie in the middle aisle?!?

After Wal-Mart, we went to the mall and ate in the food court. Tessa had a piece of pizza the size of her head and loved it! We did some shopping at a few different stores and it was so cute to watch her try to figure out what she wanted to spend her money on!

We got home kind of late, but she wanted to spread her loot out on the floor and check out everything she'd got. She had her baby doll, a pound of candy (don't ask), fake glasses and some random odds and ends from Justice. A pretty successful shopping trip overall!

We did cupcakes with Tommy and Dad and then it was off to bed!

For her friend and family party this year, she decided to share a pool party with her cousin again (they did it the year before and had so much fun!). She wanted a unicorn pool party theme and surprisingly enough, I found some plates and napkins that actually had that theme--ha!

We blew out candles and opened presents before they started swimming. She got so many fun things! All of our family was there and she had a few sweet friends show up. 

After presents and cake, they had so much fun swimming and playing with the presents Tessa had opened. We love doing pool parties because the clean up is minimal and the entertainment is so easy!

We had so much fun celebrating seven with you, sweet girl!

To Tessa on your 7th birthday...

7 years. It doesn't seem possible. I can literally remember the SECOND I found out I was pregnant with you and all the chaos that came after! It feels like it was yesterday.

I am having SO much fun with you as a seven year old. Your toothless grin makes me so happy and your sweet heart brings me joy.

You have started to REALLY find your sass. It's not often that you back talk or get an attitude, but it's happened a little more frequently lately. It always takes me by surprise a bit and sometimes makes me giggle on the inside because of how much attitude you can give with your eyes! You definitely let us know what you're feeling.

You get really offended when you get in trouble. You sometimes get mad, but usually just get sad and won't talk to us for a little bit. We just give you your space and after 30 minutes or so of being alone in your room, you're ready to work it out! You never stay too mad for too long!

99% of the time, you are sweet and kind! You are ALWAYS willing to help us out with pretty much anything and are always wanting to pitch in and learn about what we're doing. You're like a second mother to your little brother--you've made a lot of money recently changing his diapers because daddy offers to pay you, knowing you'll say yes and he'll get out of changing dirty diapers.

You're already a little entrepreneur and LOVE finding ways to earn money so you can buy what you want. You ask for extra chores and always want me to try to sell things on Facebook. You are constantly asking to have garage sales and lemonade stands so you can sell your junk--I love it!

You're still the best one in the family at finding things. When everyone else has looked for something, we ask you to look and you almost ALWAYS find whatever is missing!

You love playing with slime and watching YouTube videos about making slime. You could seriously watch them for hours if we let you! I always say I'll never understand but then sometimes catch myself watching them with you--ha! You're into nail polish and Junie B Jones books and stuffed animals and twirly skirts. You like riding bikes and playing outside with your brothers. You would be pantsless every hour of the day if we allowed it. You HATE wearing pants! You love swimming and playing in the water, but nothing tops your love of swinging on the monkey bars and trying to skip as many bars as you can!

I seriously LOVE the age you're at and the person you're becoming. I enjoy our conversations and hope you're always willing to share your heart and thoughts with me! You're my best girl and I'm so glad you're my daughter!

Happy birthday, Tessa Grace!

Wilhelm, party of 6!

Welp.

It's official.

We've lost our minds.

We now have two foster kiddos and have become a family of six! I'm sure there are some large bio and foster families out there laughing and thinking, "4 kids? That's nothing!" I know so many people with a LOT of kids that handle it with such grace and make it look easy (I'm lookin at you, Nick and Maria Engels!!!).

While they're over there looking cool as a cucumber, I'm now the hot mess mom that's late everywhere with spit up on my shirt and the contents of the diaper bag rolling around in the back of my car. It takes me 10 minutes to load and unload our vehicle with 4 kids and all the crap necessary stuff that comes with them!

HOWEVER.....

While two additional kids at once was NOT on our agenda at all, God was doing His thing once again.

After our first placement went home so unexpectedly, we took a week off and then let our workers know we were ready for the next one. I had really had on my heart that God was telling me we were going to have a little girl soon. Under the age of one. And I was perfectly okay with that! We told them they could say yes to any placement under the age of two without any huge medical needs.

We were excited and ready for our next kiddo. But I can't tell you how many texts we got with a heads up about a kiddo and then a text a bit later saying they'd already been placed. It's crazy how quickly the little ones in foster care get placed! We would take 30 minutes or so to review their paperwork and by the time we'd made a decision, they'd already been put somewhere. We are so glad there are so many homes wanting these kiddos, but we were getting kind of bummed because it had been another week or so that we were waiting on a kid and just not getting any placements.

And then we got a call for a little boy! 21 months old, no special needs, just taken into care. We said yes right away and arrangements were made for him to come that night. I was a little disappointed in the fact that I thought maybe I had heard God wrong since it was a boy and older than one. But I also felt confident in saying yes to this little guy.

He came to our house with crazy hair and a super quiet personality. He is a GREAT sleeper, calm mannered and loves to eat! For the first few weeks, the only time he got upset was when he was hangry (which I totally understand). He became SUPER attached to Tessa and wants to be with her all the time. And she loves it! His transition into our family has been seamless.

We had gotten into a good routine with him and we all loved him so much already! But I kept feeling a tug on my heart about a little girl. Like there was a little lady out there that needed me--I had a literal pain in my heart thinking that I wasn't with her while not even knowing who she was. I kept praying about it and let Nick know how I was feeling. We had been told little man might not be with us a SUPER long time (nobody knows for sure in the system, but that was just the heads up we were given). So I asked Nick what he thought about telling our workers to keep an eye out for another placement, but to tell them we only wanted a girl between the ages of newborn to 18 months. It took a few days but he eventually agreed to it and we let our workers know.

We figured with the age and gender stipulations it would take several weeks to get a new placement and that we would maybe only have two extra kiddos for a short time.

You would think we would know better--ha! After getting so many false alarms about babies while waiting for our second placement....it took TWO DAYS for one of my workers to text me.

She said, "You might want to start preparing for a baby girl."

I didn't get too excited because I didn't figure it would actually go through. But as the day went on, she was able to give me more details and eventually said it was a definite thing and we were getting a 2 month old girl that night!

My heart was RACING and I went into mom-mode. I ran to Goodwill and bought a few things to get us through until we knew what all she needed. One of my sweet workers had bought us some diapers and bottles and onesies and wipes and bows, so I ran by and grabbed those from her. As I was driving to get home to meet this little girl my heart had been waiting for, I called one of my lifelong friends that also does foster care. I was telling her about getting this kiddo and where she was from. She said, "Oh, that's where T (her youngest foster daughter) is from!" I told her the baby's name and she said, "NO WAY!"

Friends, this is how good God is.

We pieced together that the baby girl we were getting was the little sister of the girl Ashley has had for the last year.

Out of ALL of the people in Kansas that she could have been placed with, He chose us. A family that already knew and loved her biological sister.  A family that had already baby-sat her biological sister. A family that could keep her and her sister in contact and let their relationship grow while each of us has them.

He is good.

And through Him, we now have two sons and two daughters. I wish SO bad I could post a picture of the 4 of them and show you how blood has nothing to do with sibling love. My kids have taken these two in and loved them like they've been with us since day one (and it feels like they have).

So we are tired, we are busy, we've had a lot of PB and J dinners and our house is a disaster.

But MAN, our hearts are bursting at the seams!

Hard things are not so hard when you know you're living in God's will for your life.

Whitney's Wedding

As much fun as Disney World and the beach was, at the end of our vacation came the REAL reason for spending time in Florida! We got to see Whitney Jo marry her man!

Their wedding was on a Saturday afternoon and the weather was PERFECT. Sunny skies, blue water and a gorgeous stretch of sand.

We had the most delicious breakfast together cooked by her awesome family and future family! And then we lounged a bit, I got to watch Whit get her hair and makeup done and then it was finally time for the big moment!

We got to spend a few minutes with the bride before she walked down the aisle...such a sweet time!

Me with my hubs, remembering the day we said I Do.....not really. We were just enjoying the sunshine and waiting for the bride to make her appearance!

And Miss Hollywood herself showed up! Ha! Brylie is such a character and so sassy...I LOVE her!

The wedding set up was BEAUTIFUL!

 

Her daddy walker her down the aisle....he wasn't crying, but I can't say he wasn't thinking about it ;) There were a few random spectators on the beach that were enjoying watching the wedding too!

 

There ceremony was short and sweet and perfect. Before we knew it, they were pronounced husband and wife....Mr. and Mrs. Harper!

And then it was time to PARTY. We hung out on the beach for a few more pictures.....

We loved hanging out with this crew all week and getting to know Stephen's family better!

After pictures, we went inside for a DELICIOUS dinner. It was seriously SO good. And the decorations were the cutest!

After dinner, we topped the night off with a bonfire on the beach. It was literally the perfect way to end a perfect day. The guys and kids played football for awhile and the rest of us toasted smores and lounged. It was awesome!
 

The whole day was magic! 

Congratulations, Mr. and Mrs. Harper!

It was all worth it

65 days.

That's all the longer he was meant to be "ours."

65 days of laughing, crying, learning, hugging, stretching, growing, praying.

Our house is a little quieter, our hearts are a little sadder and our arms feel a little emptier.

We were not shocked he got sent home (as reintegration was the goal from the beginning), but we are heartbroken at the abrupt way it happened.

I have heard time and again that the "system is broken." I'm here to tell you, friends, it is broken indeed.

He was failed time and again by his case team (we thank God that OUR case team was so supportive or we would have been lost in all of this).

He became "just another case" on their list.

We were unable to advocate for him in the way that was needed because of lack of communication from his team.

We were given 16 hours to prepare for him leaving. They decided all of this at a court hearing that we knew nothing about by a judge who I don't think was given even a fraction of the information that should have been required to make that decision.

Tessa and I were out of town when I got the phone call to "please go ahead and pack up all of his stuff to send home tomorrow." We didn't even get to tell him goodbye. 

While in some ways 65 days felt like an eternity, at the same time......it just wasn't enough. Enough time to reassure him he's loved unconditionally, enough time to teach him that God is always with him, enough time to show him a different life, enough time to give him the resources to grow up to be a good person.

But......it WAS enough time for us to fall in love with him, to show him that throwing fits doesn't get him what he wants, to teach him where his nose and eyes are, to introduce him to Puppy Dog Pals and Paw Patrol, to learn that he LOVES dinosaurs and trucks, to show him how to swing, to learn the difference in his fake mean face and his real mean face, to pray for him and his family every night at bedtime, to let him be a little kid without fear of anything.

Foster care is still so new to us. There is still SO much to learn and so much to experience and so many kids to help. Even after going through all of this with our first placement, we know that not every case will be this way and we rest assured that God will bring the right kids to us at the right time. It was all worth it.

Please join us in praying that even though the system failed him, that his family will not. That he is safe, protected and loved. That him and his mom and siblings will be restored in every way possible.

And if you've ever even THOUGHT about fostering, PLEASE take the next step. Whether that's praying about it more, calling an agency to see where to start, taking the class....or even messaging me with questions and fears! Just step out in faith, knowing that God will meet you where you are.

Beach Babies

After our adventures at Disney World, we headed to Panama City Beach for cousin Whit's wedding.

We got to the beach house pretty late at night, so we tried to get all of our luggage upstairs and situated without waking anybody else up! We weren't able to see a whole lot in the dark, but the next morning, we were greeted with the most beautiful view!

 The kids getting their first view of the ocean!

They were ready to get going, so they threw on their swimming suits and hopped in the heated pool before they'd even eaten breakfast! They spent as much time as they could in the pool the whole week. The ocean water was FREEZING, so we went in about ankle deep, but that was as far as they wanted to go!

 We did take lots of walks on the beach looking for seashells. Tessa found some pretty ones to take back to her class!

 My cute little mermaid!

One day, Nick, Tommy, Tessa and I went on a deep sea fishing tour. It was a lot of fun! We started catching fish as soon as we put our poles in. Tommy got a little whiny (I had given them dramamine so the boat wouldn't make them sick without realizing that the medication itself could make you feel like crap!) and it was pretty cold out on the water, but we still had so much fun! We got to see dolphins, too--that was the highlight of the boat ride for the kiddos. We caught enough fish to feed all the guys that night, so that was fun!

We also did an air boat ride to look for gators. We didn't get to see any gators, but Tessa did get to help drive the air boat (which we found out later she did NOT want to ride up there) and it was still neat to go through some of the bayou's and rivers.  

 

 

 

We got to hold a baby gator before we went out on the water! It was so cute and felt MUCH softer than I thought it would.

One evening, Whitney's brother in law Brian took some family pictures for us. They were so fun and turned out great!

I made the kids take a few more shots with me on my phone. They were SO over it--ha! But they were good sports and I'm glad we have pictures on the beautiful beach!

We had SO much fun in the days leading up to Whitney's beach wedding! We got to do a little bit of everything....adventure, relaxing, swimming, sand, sun, fishing, alligators. It was the BEST vacation!